Handling The Uninvited

Author, Brittany Champion

Today’s post is about handling wedding crashers. While Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson have brought comedy to the subject, I assure you, this is no laughing matter.

Couples are frequently perplexed at the number of people who choose to disregard common etiquette and “crash” their events. I’ve seen this all too often and would like to offer suggestions for dealing with such dilemmas.

I know some of you are thinking, “Not my wedding!” but trust me, no matter how thoroughly you plan, there’s always the likelihood of the dreaded crasher.

Chalkboard Seating Chart

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There are three types of wedding crashers.
First are the potential guests who’ve been sent invitations, but choose not to RSVP. However, he/she attempts to attend the wedding by rudely seating themselves during reception. Pump the brakes and slow it down….It doesn’t work that way people!
If guests are invited to an event that requires an RSVP, it is essential they respond accordingly. This situation can be handled by designating a close friend or relative as a hostess (or discuss this with the wedding planner if you’ve hired one).
Couples can supply the hostess (or planner) with a printout of the seating arrangement and note the names of the invited guests as they enter and take their seats. When all RSVP guests have been seated and served the firsts course, if there are additional seats from RSVP no-shows, couples can instruct the hostess to seat those who’ve failed to RSVP. This will guarantee guests are prioritized based on RSVP response, which is only fair.
The second type of wedding crasher is the “tag-along”. Oftentimes, invited guests informally invite others as their date, designating them a “plus-one”. Honestly, if the invitation doesn’t include a plus-one option, invited guests should attend solo.
In the event this shall occur, couples can plan ahead by discussing additional seating, and food and beverage options with their vendors. Although there’s a chance they may be seated separately, they’ll be content with the couples willingness to accommodate

mirror-seating-map

Lastly is the most bothersome type of crasher, the “unknown”. Believe it or not, complete strangers attend weddings. You’ve seen it in the popular film “Wedding Crashers” featuring Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson. Complete strangers attend weddings for the food, drinks, and a potential good time.

There is no accommodating this type of crasher. Once spotted, couples should take the necessary precautions to effectively remove the uninvited guest(s) from the event.
While spotting the odd-man-out may be easy for some couples, usually those with a smaller guests count, couples with a guests count of 200  or more may have a bit of difficulty detecting who’s who.

If someone at the wedding looks unfamiliar there’s no harm in asking “pardon me but have we met?” or “thanks for coming, who’d you attend with?” Couples can ask other guest if they recognize the individual as well.

While I can’t confirm why crashers exist I can reassure you the above steps can keep your special day worry and stress free.

Do you have any ideas to  to share? Let us know in your comments.

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Author, Brittany, specializes in weddings and both, formal and informal social affairs. Brittany can help you plan your dream marriage proposal, from the moment you decide to pop the question, to the moment your significant other says, “Yes”!

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