With all the details leading up to the wedding, planning a rehearsal dinner as well may feel overwhelming. Not only is it an additional event, it is usually the night before the wedding when frenzied activity may be reaching a peak. You may be tempted to skip it entirely. For the most part, those in the know regarding wedding etiquette do not recommend it.
The purpose of a rehearsal dinner is both to show appreciation to those who have made the extra effort to be in your wedding and help each of your close friends and family members get to know each other better. Plus, the rehearsal is very likely to spill into mealtime when you all will be hungry anyway. That said, the dinner does not have to be a formal, sit-down affair. There are many ways you can get the wedding party together for an inexpensive meal.
You may be thinking the groom’s parents will plan and pay for a nice meal. Traditionally, this is the case, but times change. Just as the bride’s parents now frequently pay for only part (or none) of the wedding, the groom’s parents are no longer “required” to put on a dinner. It can actually be arranged or paid for by you or anyone in the wedding party.
Whether you hold with tradition or not, the same budget saving ideas apply. How you address the questions of Who? What? When? and Where? can greatly affect your total cost.
Whom do you invite? Traditional etiquette dictates that you invite the entire wedding party, plus parents, grandparents, your brothers and sisters who are not in the wedding, stepfamily members, the officiant, and everyone’s spouses or significant others. That’s often expanded to also include all out-of-town guests and anyone else who came with them, as well as non-paid vendors. Depending on your wedding, this can add up. There are two approaches couples have taken to pare this down to a manageable cost.
- Invite only the wedding party and clergy to a formal rehearsal dinner and have a separate but larger informal get together to include the core group plus families, out-of-town guests, and others you’d like to thank for their help. The additional event could be after the wedding but before out-of-town guests go back home or, if everyone is in town, earlier in the week. While this does add extra planning, it allows you to save versus a formal affair for the whole group.
- Include only the core wedding group in the rehearsal dinner. If funds are severely limited, this may be your only option. Do express your gratitude in other ways, however, to those who were especially helpful during the wedding planning or went to great lengths to attend.
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Who makes the food? Chances are extremely high you will not have time to cook, rehearse, and practice the wedding the day before! If someone else is hosting, you will, of course, have the much lesser task of showing up at the appointed time. But if it falls on your shoulders, you cannot realistically prepare the rehearsal dinner yourself. So, how else can you save on the cost? Here are some ideas:
- Hire a caterer to cook a main dish, and ask a family member or friend to take over the rest of the preparations. This is more economical than having the entire meal catered, yet eases the burden on your helper.
- Have a potluck as an informal reception. Request that everyone bring a dish; then, have an informal meal after rehearsal.
- Pick up food at a warehouse club store. You can usually get premade trays of party food for less than ordering at the regular grocery store or deli.
What do you serve? The food itself, of course, will have much to do with the cost of your rehearsal dinner. It is perfectly acceptable to go with any of a variety of low-cost options.
Serve filling, yet inexpensive, foods such as:
– pizza
– hot dogs and hamburgers
– Chinese food
-barbeque
-deli-type sandwiches
-lasagna, spaghetti, or other one-pot meal
When will you hold it, earlier or later in the day? The “dinner” does not necessarily have to be at dinnertime.
Have a lunch or brunch as your rehearsal meal. People usually eat less and expect smaller servings earlier in the day.
Where will it be?
- Make your rehearsal dinner an inexpensive activity. Go bowling, to a local sporting event, or to the pool, and pay for people to nosh on the snack-bar food.
- Find a free public or private setting such as:
– your house
– friend’s house
– someone’s backyard
– park
– clubhouse
– church dining room
– VFW or other fraternal organization hall - Hold the event at a buffet or other low-cost restaurant. The bill will be much lower than a more formal sit-down meal.
This post is an excerpt from the Dream Wedding on a Dime; 7 Secrets for the Budget-Savvy Bride ebook by Bobette Kyle.
Categories: Budget Saving, Wedding Parties, Wedding Planning, Wedding Tips
Tagged: budget rehearsal dinner, rehearsal dinner ideas, rehearsal dinner planning guide, Rehearsal Dinner Saving Ideas, rehearsal dinner tips, wedmepretty.com
Date: May 7, 2014
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